SEVER GRANT BARRATT

Dear Sever Grant Barratt, Today i found out that i lost one of thee most best friends and my heart is torn in millions of pieces as my mind replay the memories we had over and over, the sound of your voice echoes with the ideas we shared and our interesting debates and opinions on art your written art and your extensive vocabulary. word cannot describe what i'm going through. The thought of saying good-bye does not seem like reality and the words I'll miss you does not justify how i feel right now....therefore i will not say good-bye or i'll miss you instead i'll keep you and the memories of and with you, alive in my heart forever until i meet you again...All my love goes to your family and those whose lives you've touch in your unique way. love you bro always and for ever kido.

HANGING

Here i am and i don't no how i got here so fast.

Father God im hanging on!,  

but im slipping fast

and ghost from my  past 

are having a blast 

all because im falling at last.

How do i stay calm if there is a storm rising inside of me 

and just because i want to be set free

and some how even that is taken from me 

and all i have left is to turn to THEE

for never have THOU forsaken me

Therefore i Praise Your Holy name 

for without you my life will not be the same 

after all for some life is just a game 

because they know not the Power of Your name.

Lord hold me secure in your love and strengthen me in times when i feel i cannot go on

I need you now more then ever

In your name i pray

Amen

EMPTINESS LIES BENEATH LONELINESS LIES BENEATH WORTHLESSNESS WHICH LIES WITHIN THE CREATION OF MY EXISTENCE

the feeling i feel in side i can no longer hide i drift by every day and like a boat with out direction. I am nothing and nor will i ever be to any means of value but wil remain forever the lowest of the lowest, worthless, a disgusting piece of utter waste of existence. i am the lowest scum on earth why do i exist in this world if all i cause is complete misery why will any one even love me for I'm not worthy of any love, so please do not envy me or for I'm not worthy of any such privileges i am beneath your expectations and will only disgust you with my presence. WHY DO YOU LOVE ME WHEN I AM NOT WORTHY OF YOUR LOVE. i have no future for my self nor does the past or the present need me so please forget about me and just live a life as if i never existed for i have no meaning to the breath i exhale as to the breath i inhale i have no purpose and no meaning so therefore i do not matter